HELP please I don't know what to do...

[thats.all.folks]

DS has been testing the boundaries of late.

For the past 1 or 2 hes been up at 5am [at the latest] and will not go back to bed even though it's pitch black.

He's disobedient to everything I ask. Yes I know hes just turned 3 but I know he's not like this. He's actually a pretty good kid normally.

I ask him to doa wee he says no, I ask him to tidy up his toys he says no, I ask him not to touch something he goes and touches it, I ask him not to do something he does it. If he doesn't get his own way he drops to the floor and screams bloody murder.

I just don't know what to do. Poor DD is missing out on so much becuase I'm having to focus to much on DS.

Like now, he asked if he could have a biscuit and I said no, so he's headbutting the mattress.

I'm in tears so bloody often becuase I just dont know what to do with him anymore. Sure, I may be hormonal being 5 months pregnant but surely I can't be that hormonal. Can I?

2 minutes after the mattress headbutting and he's happily playing with a piggy bank on the floor at my feet.

WTF is going on??? I can't take it anymore.

To make matters worse, DH ran out of his ADs and only told me on Monday so I ran to the chemist and got him some more [he'd been out of them for almost a week]. DH also has the man flu so is f**k all use atm.

[SaintAnk]

I've got no experience with this and no advice. Just wanted to send you (((GBH's))) I'm sorry he's being so difficult for you right now. Hopefully that behaviour ceases soon...

[Andelica]

Join the club!! My DD1 is doing my head in at the moment.

We are thinking of doing another parenting course - DH attended one by Behaviour Tonics who focus on the 123 Magic theory last year, and we both think it would be good to go and do a refresher together. I think they also do consultations, not sure about the cost though.

My GP gave her a thorough check up last week and there is nothing physically wrong with her... so now we feel more confident about getting assistance to address some behavioural issues.

Another friend suggested a naturopath, have never been to one myself but I am open to anything at the moment.

I have also bumped her up to 2 days of day care a week instead of one (from this week) until she starts kindy next year - for the extra stimulation and socialisation (even though we do activities most other days) and just because I'm not coping very well.

Better go. There she goes again.

Good luck..

[uptheduff2009]

I know that this might not sound like much coming from someone who is newly preggas, but I did swim teaching and stuff and lots of friends have babys and toddlers in this age range. It is meant to be "normal" by their standards, but a few have tried some different handling methods. One is using Monterossi (?) which is a play based system which teaches parents to understand the whys and how to work around them and the kids to learn the what to dos and not to dos...

Otherwise I can only pray that you can stay calm enough and sane enough to get through it and start giving him an small and simple explanation on why he will or cannot do something.

My mother in law recommends diverting attention during tantrums once the lesson has been learnt (ie' you have told them and they have burst into tears). She would scream out things like "Look! Theres a pink elephant!" at my husband and that would be enough to get him up off the floor from his tantrum and put him on a new page (Unfortunantly doesn't work so well now!).


BIGGGGGGG Hugs being sent your way in the mean time!!!

[Ang&je]

hun i dont have any advice as im going thru the same thing with my 3 1/2 yr old.
he has turned into a different child the past few weeks and im not handling it very well lately,
as i said in our DIO group the other day i didnt know if it was me being more inpatient or him but it is defintly his behaviour.
im just finding harder to deal with lately aswell i feel like im constantly telling him no, which he dsnt like and whinges and wines and so on.
i used to be quite patient but his behaviour lately is really testing me and i either feel the need to yell or cry lol
so sorry no advice but just wanted to let u know i feel the same!
i dont know how many times i repeat to myself 'its just a stage'

[thats.all.folks]

thanks ladies.

It makes me feel better knowing that I'm not alone. I know that's not a nice thing to say but I'm glad. I truly thought I was the only one with the demon child....

[miamoo]

Have you read Toddler Taming? It's pretty good and "Dr Spocky' as in not any kind of parenting philosophy just common sense. It deals with behavioural issues and sleep issues.

[Buffy]

i sooooo know where you are coming from.

And my little hellraiser is only 2.
fark me. i need a stiff drink!
(i have had the worst night!)
ARRRRRRG!
i have had enough of this motherhood business

And to top it off, he has been dropping his day sleep....

[daysea]

1-2-3 Magic book

Stopped me being a non stop screaming tantrum throwing adult and turned me back into a calm and rational mummy.

Calm and rational mummy = much calmer and pleasant 3 1/2 year old.

Of course I still have hissy fits and Erin still has some really bad behaviour but mostly calmness reigns in our house now because of that book

Mind you the toilet training is completely up the creek but I shall win the good fight for undy wearing with no accidents eventually hehe

Good luck your post reads like how I felt a while back 3 year old are really tough work.

Kim

[Naomi H-B]

I have a friend who swears by Toddler Taming. She has a two year old who is a little 'spirited' shall we say!

My little bro was a tantrum chucker when he was a little one. He used to headbut everything when he didn't get his own way - the pavement, corners of cabinets everything. If it is any consolation he grew out of it and is now the sweetest, most lovely 20 year old!

There is also something in the back of my head about toddler boys and hormone surges. I am not sure what age it happens, but they basically get the biggest testosterone surge outside of puberty when they are toddlers. It could explain a lot. So maybe it is not your pregnancy hormones, but his hormones!