Would you contest a Will in this situation?

[wowzah]

Hi Lovelies

Well this is my situation, and it's one that I never, ever, thought I'd find myself in.

My grandmother died last year. She had two children, my uncle, and my mother who is deceased. My mother is survived by my brother and myself. She had been on her own for 40 years.

Probate has just been granted and my uncle (who is Executor) instructed the lawyers to send my brother and I each a copy of the Will, which was written in 2004.

The Will states that my brother and I are to receive $5000 each, and the rest of the Estate goes to my uncle.

I had no problem with this.

The strange part however, is that the cover letter from the lawyers asked me if I would be seeking independant legal advice. I found this odd so I rang my uncle. He told me he couldn't discuss it as he was the Executor, but that "Obviously there is something there and if you want to talk to your own lawyer about it then I certainly have no problem with that and would encourage you to do so"

So I don't have anything concrete, but I almost get the impression that perhaps he thinks that the estate should of been split 50/50, ie half to him and my mothers half to my brother and I.

I never in a million years thought I would be the type of person to contest a Will.

On one hand we are talking about quite a substantial amount of money, which of course would be very helpful to us, but moreso life changing to my younger brother who has just started out and has nothing behind him.

On the other hand I feel like going against her wishes would be a great injustice to her, if she wanted us to be treated equally then surely she would of made those provisions, and I also don't know what my mother would have thought. But if mum was alive then presumably she would of got half??

I have gone round and round in circles about this all night and I feel sick to my stomach.

My DH and my father have been no help!! Both have said that it is mine and my brothers decision. My brother didn't have an answer though either.

So I'm really just after some thoughts from everyone.....WWYD??

[Z'sMum]

Wow - what a tough situation to be in!
I, myself, have said that I would never in a million years contest a will either. In my eyes, the deceased person wanted it that way for a reason and we should honour his/her wishes.
However, I think you are right in saying, IF your Mother was alive, the estate would've been split equally between her and your Uncle.

I guess what I would be doing is contacting a lawyer - just for some advice at this stage.
See where you stand at least. Perhaps that may make it easier to make a decision either way.

Are you close with your Uncle? Is it something you can talk to him about on a personal level, not a legal level?
ie. how he feels about it all.

Sorry, I wasn't much help! I really don't know what I would do in this situation.

[frenchieM]

He told me he couldn't discuss it as he was the Executor, but that "Obviously there is something there and if you want to talk to your own lawyer about it then I certainly have no problem with that and would encourage you to do so"

So I don't have anything concrete, but I almost get the impression that perhaps he thinks that the estate should of been split 50/50, ie half to him and my mothers half to my brother and I.

Hmmmm....I think I would speak with a lawyer.
I think if you have your uncle's support, and he is obviously looking out for you and your brother, then I would do it.

[Miss_C]

my biggest regret is not contesting my Dad's will. I was just so devastated at the time it was no it's only money etc etc but as things transpired later I sooooooo should have done it. My Dad met a lady who on the surface seemed lovely etc etc etc but closer to then end we had our doubts, moved him a 5 1/2 hr drive away from us and only called us when he was almost dead, we had no idea he was dying. Saw him in hospital in November and he just said he had fluid on the lung (it was stage 4 cancer and he had been talked into no treatment by the witch)

He died 24 hours after we (my sister and I got there) he was obviously holding out for us.

We later found out she was his cancer nurse and he was the 6th husband that had died.

Yes we should have contested as the last will was written in the January and Dad died in the February, she got EVERYTHING. I wrote to her asking for Dad's kilt and got no response. After I got over the initial grieving We followed up with Dad's lawyer and it was all too late.

Only telling my story even though it is very different to highlight the fact that woulda shoulda coulda is a very hard thing to live with. I still get a ball of anger and pain when I think of it and how the evil cow took everything that should be for my sister and I and our children. It has been 18 years

[Kahlia]

i cant tell you what to do, but i can tell you that in my family my mum's sister (who was divorced) died and her three children obviously got inheritences split three ways. now i am not sure how this worked as my grandfather is still alive, but when my grandmother died there was a significant sum of money that must have gone to my grandfather and he chose to split it between his three children, which would have been mum and her 2 sisters. since one sister died, that portion that would have gone to her was split threeways between her children.

i think it is pretty common practice that any sum gets allocated equally between surviving parties.

that is certainly how it would have happened if your grandmother had not specified what to do with it.

when did your mother passaway? was it aftyer 2004 when the will was written? i am thinking perhaps your grandmother intended your mum and uncle to get a 50/50 split but wanted to give her grandchildren a gift on the side. at the time that would have been generous, but considering your mum has passed it would make more sense for you and your brother to get a 50/50 split of her entitlement.

what does you uncle have to say about it?

[wowzah]

Are you close with your Uncle? Is it something you can talk to him about on a personal level, not a legal level? ie. how he feels about it all.

I did try that last night but I honestly think he was trying to hard to not sway me either way he wasn't much help!! He also has his own 2 children and lost his wife to cancer a few years after he lost his sister (my mum). I think this is quite hard for him.

Hmmmm....I think I would speak with a lawyer.
I think if you have your uncle's support, and he is obviously looking out for you and your brother, then I would do it.

This is pretty much what DH has just said to me. He also said that if I truly felt that I didn't want to contest it because I didn't think Mum would approve then that was a good reason not to do it, but if I wasn't going to contest it because I was worried about what my Uncle would think, he didn't think that was a good reason as he feels that my Uncle supports us.

Only telling my story even though it is very different to highlight the fact that woulda shoulda coulda is a very hard thing to live with. I still get a ball of anger and pain when I think of it and how the evil cow took everything that should be for my sister and I and our children. It has been 18 years

Oh hun thats a horrible story Thinking about my kids has also come into it for me to. I would like to think that my mum would of wanted me to make sure my kids where looked after, but would she want me to do it at the expense of her mothers wishes?

when did your mother passaway? was it aftyer 2004 when the will was written? i am thinking perhaps your grandmother intended your mum and uncle to get a 50/50 split but wanted to give her grandchildren a gift on the side. at the time that would have been generous, but considering your mum has passed it would make more sense for you and your brother to get a 50/50 split of her entitlement.

My mum passed in 1995 and my grandmother wrote her Will in 2004. A lawyer wrote it, so I would assume that the lawyer would of told her that the usual practice was to split everything between surviving children and if they had predeceased then their children, but perhaps she specifically didn't want to do that?

[ge0rge]

Have you read the entire will - cover to cover?? Is there any explanation as to why she made that decision?? And when she made the will, was she under 'pressure' from someone to write it in this manner?

You have to consider it from all angles - including what was your grandmothers relationship like with your mother BEFORE your mum passed away.

Before you contest the will - what you have to remember is that you have to put up the costs UNTIL the matter is settled. And if you lose, depending on the judgement, it could be you that pays for it (the judge could decide to make the estate pay the costs also)

Go and PAY to see a solicitor - do not see a 'no win no fee' solicitor (these guys will launch something, just to see IF they can get anything, and then they also take your $$$ if you do not win) - one that deals specifically in wills. They will tell you what your chances are - and how much they think it could cost. Also, I think that the cover letter is a standard form/set, as by law they have to advise you to get seperate legal advice - so I don't think anything is meant by that part. You are given the same advice if you are getting a home loan or anything else that is binding.

If you feel that it is something that you want to pursue, you also need to be ready for some bad blood from your uncle and his family - as nothing divides families faster, and more, than money from a deceased person. If you do decide to pursue it, ask your solicitor if he thinks it would be worthwhile approaching your uncle first, and ask him directly about the fairness, or whether it should be straight to contesting.

Its a tough one - and I come from a large family, where this will never be a problem (to many aunts/uncles and relatives) - and on my Dads side, my nan has stitched her will up so tight, that no one can contest the will that she has specified.

Good luck, with whatever decision you make.

[wowzah]

Have you read the entire will - cover to cover?? Is there any explanation as to why she made that decision?? And when she made the will, was she under 'pressure' from someone to write it in this manner?

You have to consider it from all angles - including what was your grandmothers relationship like with your mother BEFORE your mum passed away.

Thanks ge0rge, you always have such balanced and constructive advice

The Will is one A4 page, 6 clauses, and offers no explanation as to why she wrote it the way she did.

I was 15 when my mum passed so I don't really have any idea what their relationship was like, and my dad hasn't really been able to help there either. I gather things may have been less than pleasant?

I am beginning to think that I will go and see a solicitor, and then go back to my Uncle with whatever advice I have been given and see what he says.....I just don't know if I can see myself going through the Court system.

[Miralen]

I've not read all the repsonses so not sure if this has been mentioned or not but it's not just about money. There is quite possibly material things of your grandmother's that may be of sentimental value to you and perhapsthis is one thing your uncle is trying to say while not really being allowed to. I also wonder how old you and your brother were in 2004? 8 years is a lot of growing up time if you were in your teens/early 20's or even younger and this may have been a consideration for your grandmother. ETA have just worked the age thing out from your replies.

I think given your uncle is open, and from what you've said even encouraged you, to see a solicitor/lawyer then that would be a good place to start. I think you have 6 months to contest a will, though that time limit may be different in different states, so you needn't rush your decision once you have sought the legal advice and considered all the facts. I'm sorry for your loss and this situation you find yourself in.

[ge0rge]

Thanks ge0rge, you always have such balanced and constructive advice

The Will is one A4 page, 6 clauses, and offers no explanation as to why she wrote it the way she did.

I was 15 when my mum passed so I don't really have any idea what their relationship was like, and my dad hasn't really been able to help there either. I gather things may have been less than pleasant?

I am beginning to think that I will go and see a solicitor, and then go back to my Uncle with whatever advice I have been given and see what he says.....I just don't know if I can see myself going through the Court system.

I would think that at 15, that you would of known what type of relationship your mother and grandmother had. Whether it be strained, it be non existent, or loving and caring. If you don't know what type of relationship they had - does that mean they did not have one at all?? Because if they did not - then that may be why the will was written the way it has been. I am not saying that you are not entitled to anything, just saying that you may find out some stuff that you might not want to know, and that you may not like. It could also explain why your dad is not very forthcoming in the advice department, as he may know more than he is letting on.

I know when I was 15, as a family, we opted out of my grandmothers (mums mum) life - it was due to a horrible situation, that my grandmother refused to believe happened (even though the perp was sentenced to 7 yrs jail) and she blamed us for sending him to jail for 'NOTHING'. so at 15, I knew that my mums and grandmothers relationship was strained, and almost non existant (not that they did not love each other), but because my mum loved us more, as it was her job to protect us.

You may have to start thinking about what it was like when your mother died - was your grandmother there, was she part of your life afterwards, or was she basically a non contributing person that you 'knew' of.

It may be hard, but this is going to have to be part of what you consider - as the solicitor (if they are worth their $$$) will ask you similar questions, to ascertain why she decided to write the will the way she did.